As I sit here with my laptop on my lap, tears are streaming and I just can't seem to get them to stop. My 16yr old son would (in my unqualified, mummy opinion) be a raging alcoholic and drug addict. What the hell??? when did this happen where the heck was this fork in the road and how the hell did we end up on the wrong path. As a mummy it's hard not to take your child's misgivings and problems personally and to heart. I know this is not my fault, I know I did not put the drugs or the drink in his hands. But how the heck did this happen. I have seen this coming for quite some time you know and have tried every trick known to man to alter my son's path, all to no avail. God where is Dr Phil when you really need him! (ok bad joke I know).
I am trying (perhaps a little too hard) to stay unaffected, and am failing miserably I can't sleep I can't eat and I am getting regular full blown migraines. Before you say it yes I have spoken with my GP about all of this and no it seems I am not depressed, I am just overly stressed. Hell if I get any more stressed I may well sponataneously combust.
Ok now that I have that out of my system I best go, am off to pick up my terrible teen and organise for him to go stay elsewhere for a few days which has kindly been offered as a release for me by his girlfriends mum. She will try and pick up where I have left off to see if we can get matthew's head in the right space. More soon!
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